Transcript: Christian Motivation: Overcoming Frustration with Feedback Systems

Namaste, good morning and good evening my dear friends. A warm welcome to one and all of you to this motivational series. We call it as motivational series because we want to motivate people to overcome challenges, to overcome problems. Because in life there are a lot of unprecedented events, there are a lot of things that we don't expect but we have to face it, we have to meet it and we have to overcome, right? So that's the reason we are in the process of digging through many topics that crosses everyone's path as far as the journey of life is concerned. And we don't want to ignore any topic. Some of the topics may be really silly, sounding really kind of a joke. But still, these are the topics which can really sensitize a person and can create bad moods and stuff like that. So we are not ignoring anything. we definitely want to bring every possible thing every tiniest thing every minute thing every granular thing to your attention and that's going to be helpful on a longer run so today at another topic at another session at another day it's really shining here after a long rainy season so today we are going to talk through an important topic that's called as feedback system Many people really, you know, hate this feedback system. Some people love this feedback system. Some people neutral, 50-50, I like, sometimes I don't like, sometimes. If people talk good about me, I like, people talk bad about me, I don't like. That is the human mentality, that is the intention of every human being. We always want to hear good about us, correct? We don't want people to talk anything ill about us. Therefore, we have that kind of mindset that we want to embrace only that is good to us. This is the general mentality of any human being, nothing wrong. But there is some correction needed. Why? Because we are living in this world where there are varieties of people. There are diversities being involved. There are mixed opinions being involved. It's a democratic country and the law of democracy is every one of us have right to express everything that is in our heart about anything or anyone. This is the law of democracy. However, it cannot insult a person, it cannot hurt a person, it cannot, what to say, demotivate a person or it cannot pull down a person's reputation or credibility as far as, you know, his reputation is concerned in the society. So, these are the norms, these are the rules, which every one of us will have to follow when we give feedback on others, correct? Now, feedback as a system is pretty much implemented in the private sector more than public sector. Now, let us review this very carefully. When I say public sector, the public sector's review of feedback will be through an election voting system, correct? Once in five years, we elect prime minister. It is people's feedback on what they think about the previous government's regime or, you know, their performance. And obviously, the election results is the good testimony of what people think or what people have considered concerning the previous government's performance. If they reelect, yes, they have done very well, which means there is a good feedback. If they don't elect the same party and they elect a different party, obviously, the results are going to justify and prove that people are not happy with the previous government. That means the feedback is negative towards the previous government. Now, we need to wait for another five years to really see the voting system on this current government, which has been newly elected, the party which has been newly elected. This is another way of looking at the public sector feedback system, right? This is nothing but the election or voting system. Now, in the public sector, there are government authorities also. There are ministers. There are councillors. There are like chief ministers, prime ministers, and there are a lot of other, you know, it's a big hierarchy. It's a big function. It's a big hierarchy. Now, how their feedback is being reviewed? There is a, you know, voting that is being held in the, for the municipality, for the councillors. And it's like a local legislative assembly that is being set up. And that will determine whether the people are really happy with the current performance. and that is a good indicator for the current government. Whether their party is doing very well in certain states or certain districts or certain, you know, local panchayats and stuff like that. And that is a good indicator and it is a corrective measure. They can correct and every smart person will be really implementing the course correction. And that is how you see some parties are really strong. For 20 long years, they rule one state. For 30 long years, they rule one district or something like that. This simply tells that that party is open to hear people feedback and they are able to go through the course correction Now this is another review of public sector Now we will come to private sector in a moment. I know your fingers are really crossed. You want to hear that. Correct. Just give me a moment. Okay. Now, how about the individuals sitting in the government offices, IAAS officers and IPS officers and all the other police departments, they have their hierarchy of review system and that is again coming from the public what public is thinking and that is where social media like Facebook Twitter and all these things are whatsapp group and all these are very powerful and news media very powerful because the people belonging to the public sector they have a constant eye on this social media what people are thinking about them and that is nothing but the feedback system right they are able to come in towards the police department the police department is not functioning well they are able to command command towards the administrative council they are not doing a good job municipality council they are not doing a good job in bangalore it is bbmp bbmp is not doing a good job during the flood situations the quality of the road is not good and all that so there is a administrative council which will be appointed to review these social feedback because why this will if they don't address this this will affect the parties reputation parties credibility when the voting comes nobody will really respect they got to fix the problem this is how they will be really eyeing up on the feedback system negative feedback positive feedback positive feedback whatever right now it's not whatever I will explain now before I get into the private sector enough of this public sector before I get into the private sector what is the difference between a positive feedback and negative feedback positive feedback is to appreciate some of the good things that you have done some of the accomplishments that you have done in style right some of your strengths some of your skills some of your capabilities some of your potential which was phenomenal and deserves appreciation deserves a big pat on your back right now how you should really take this positive feedback is feel good feel happy of who you are and all the hard work that you are put in to bring that effort out feel good there is nothing wrong feel happy have a party have a blast no problem but then don't get carried away that is the problem with human beings or don't be complacent don't get carried away don't be complacent these are the two different things don't get carried away in the sense ha i have reached the top of my world i have reached the heights of the sky now i have to do nothing more no one can say this not even bill gates not even the top rich businessman in India Ambani Adani or anyone else can say this why because they will always you go and ask them they will tell the same answer they will always march forward looking for the next milestone next planning next this is our person always marches you know forward and really flies high and there is no limit for exploration there is no limit for achievement there is no limit for what you can achieve in your life correct this is our leader things this is our a person who wants to be always successful things and he takes the positive feedback but he you know a person who wants to be always on the success path these positive feedbacks will create more aggression and fear that i need to be consistent i need to do more i need to ensure that people consistently appreciate and consider whatever i am doing correct and that will really make him to plan more think more think big you know outside the outside the box or outside his boundaries and not being complacent is also is also something that I've answered it's all it's all one and the same getting carried away is flying high on the sky always thinking of the success stories what you are seduced in that success story and what happens you are losing track you cannot you won't you will lose some of your skills what you had acquired forget about acquiring new skills even the current skills also will diminish and vanish so don't get carried away being complacent is what I have already explained that you cannot limit your growth you cannot say that I have reached the top of the skies you know no you cannot make that statement because the world is dynamic world is changing to embrace the changes you also need to invent few ideas you also need to be innovative and there is no limit for that and there can be no limit for that right what whatever a person had a vision some two decades ago about mobility he started with palm top and what is that compact PCs and all that right now today that vision is given birth it's everything all about it's all about mobile without a mobile phone you cannot survive in your life anything you want to do in terms of transactions you still need your mobile for OTPs correct or not someone implemented had a vision for the cybersecurity and you know privacy and all that and in introduced something called as a password mechanism now what happens password any hacker can crack now so they introduce something called as OTP which is live which will be sent only 30 seconds or 10 seconds before and valid only for 2 minutes. So no hacker can do anything about it. But then it was given birth a visionary had that vision but it was given birth and somebody cracked that vision and then another vision was introduced Therefore what is that I trying to say here is it a growing market It not a diminishing market or a stagnant market No market, no innovation can go to stagnancy mode or go to the diminishing side. Some or other things will have to be invented again. That's how the market keeps going. Because why? People will be sick and tired otherwise using the same feature. Can you imagine the kind of PC that you are using somewhere before the millennium and the kind of PC that you have? The PCs that I used to have, it's like 0.5 GB or 256 MB only is the memory capacity and we used to survive in that kind of PC. But now 16 GB memory is also not enough. What am I doing? Something exceptionally great. Actually nothing, nothing great. The same kind of work, what I was able to do in four hours, I'm doing it in two hours or half an hour or one hour. Correct. That's why I'm trying to tell you world won't wait. It will keep progressing forward. People really want new things. Therefore, you also need to be dynamic. That's why feedback system is very important. Do not look at the negative feedback as a negative feedback. But it's the feedback that will really help you to grow forward, march forward. It will really help you to assist the thoughts of the crowd, how differently they are thinking. They really don't want, you know, use the same product or they want a different product or they want some amendments in the current product. Good example, I'll tell you. There is a company by name, there was a company by name or there is a company by name Canon. Canon film roll, you know, right? And the film roll was being used widely in the early 1980s and 1990s or even in millennium. It was full of that kind of film rolls only. but one person from Canon he approached the management he said I have a new invention called as digital camera and he they laughed at him and they mocked him and they sent him kicked him off and that guy resigned and he went and sold it to Apple Apple Macintosh right and that guy took it and you know it is digital market now and he's and he became a big entrepreneur after that and there is a big story actually he approached HP first and HP rejected also and then he went to apple and now you know the digital world and where is canon film roll now gone probably canon could have paid attention to people's feedback or someone's innovation or innovative thought innovation thought which is different from the current market is also feedback right it is different which is nothing but a feedback i have something new i have something invent i've invented invented new why because this market is going to go away at some point of time because why people don't want to use that it's so costly and it's involved lot of effort you know go to that red room and kind of do that processing and all that now what all can be you know processed in a usb stick and immediately you can give print that's it you know and the printer business also flourished because of this so somebody rejected this idea somebody grabbed that idea who rejected really failed who grabbed that idea really was successful so which side you want to be that's the way how you need to review a negative feedback negative feedback is not a negative feedback at all right now i'm already into the private sector okay in private sector especially the corporate industry people hate this appraisal system they really don't want appraisals why because ah my ears will be flooded with tons of feedback this manager fellow will always keep you know throwing stones at me no it's not throwing stones it's like throwing you know you know what is that flowers you know they welcome certain vips by showering flowers on them right it's like that it depends how you look at things correct and i will tell you something else with that we close if there are going to be 10 negative feedbacks given by your manager for example right you can make a note of all the 10 negative feedbacks you can have a notepad notepad is a good system do not go with an angry face and a fighting mode no that's not the right attitude everyone has rights to to express what they think about you correct it's not what you think about yourself is the same what others think about you correct that's a good for proverb or a good statement you agree with that right now you make a note of this go back home I'm giving you the tips I will close with that out of the 10 feedbacks you know the truth you your mind is the index of the real who you are you know the truth you definitely know where you have slipped off and failed and have some broad mind. Don't read that negative feedback as an offensive thought, revengeful thought, defensive thought and thinking that self-complacency. I am the best. No one can defeat my record or something like that. If you are going to review these negative feedbacks like that, all of them will be invalid only. You will make cross marks against everything but you should have an open mindset. Let people think about me. Let me review those carefully. I will tell you So out of the stone, out of the 10 negative feedbacks, not all 10 are going to be valid. There could be certain feedbacks people might have given due to envy or they are revengeful against you or they have lot of offensive attitude against you Such things you can obviously put cross marks It negative No don worry negative on a negative feedback okay now the remaining five you agree right that people are really giving a feedback yes i'm an angry man i'm short-tempered i do not know how to control myself or i'm not progressing you know at a good pace as far as my technical caliber is concerned so many you know feedback they may give or this guy could improve in his communication skills presentation skills so many feedback and you know the truth make a tick mark and go to your manager again and tell him yes i agree with five out of ten it's not that i have any offense on the remaining five but i don't agree as much as you have rights to give me the feedback i have the rights to reject certain feedback but the remaining five i agree and i need your help so collaborate with your manager ask him for guidance ask him for a little bit of you know shouldering and obviously any good manager will help you right and they are going to show you the pathway a career pathway or goal settings they call it as they set a goal and they will take you through the goal settings and they will help you achieve this is the way to look at things correct this will only help you this kind of system only will help you or this kind of attitude only will help you to march ahead if you look at people who are failing consistently right who are failing always they would have taken the negative feedback as negative no that is not the truth i will ignore everything who knows out of 10 all 10 are valid sometimes all 10 are invalid i'm not denying that you may be a perfect person right but it's very rare to find a perfect person you know who will mark all 10 negative feedbacks as invalid no it is really rare to find if there is one tell me i want to talk to that person really at least one feedback will be valid negative feedback right please take it to your heart don't take it to no please take it to your mind, don't take it too hard, don't take it very personally, right? You know, how dare they can comment against me and all that and don't connect it with something. I'll give you one quick example, right? There used to be a very close friend of mine, we used to gel together and when the feedback timing came and the appraisal timing, all gave very nice feedback and there was one guy who was given a negative feedback, big long story he has written and the manager read it for me but he did not disclose the name. Then I didn't know what to do because according to the appraisal system there needs to be privacy that must be maintained otherwise it will be a kind of a violation. But then under certain specific circumstances, yes the manager is allowed to reveal names provided the nature of the person is matured and if he is going to maintain confidentiality. So I and my manager had a very good report. This happened long ago, maybe 15 years ago I think so, 15 or 16 years ago. he disclosed the name. I was really shocked and I was offended. How can this guy being my very close friend talk long stories about me and this and that I was jumping to the ground and all that. Then after a couple of days I calmed down myself and I said I need a copy of that feedback and my manager really understood. The guy is having some listening skills right some hearing skills and he gave me the copy right without the name again. Then I was carefully reading word by word word by word, word by word. Again, I got angry. But you know what? Although I was angry, I started working on those feedback with a positive mindset. But my anger was towards that person. Then two years later, I understood all that he has told was for my good. Then I had to call him up and I have to appreciate for what he did two years ago. After that, we parted ways. He went to a different project. I went to a different project. We both had manager changes. That's a different story. but the feedback what he gave was to help me why because feedback is one thing which cannot be told on the face because people will get offended therefore you need to wait for timing you need to wait for seasons like appraisals right seasons like there are a lot of names each company has different different names right they you can input your feedback in the tool or a survey or whatever wait for those timings you need not offend anyone face to face that won't work very well right so So you need to really abide to this protocol, abide to these norms. This is only for your growth and this will really help you. There is no point getting offended to negative feedback. If that was the case, the world itself won't grow. Negative feedback is the one which is helping the market to change, which is helping the market to become dynamic. Every business needs this and that's good. So no offenses please when it comes to feedback. have an open and positive mindset. Let anyone comment whatever they want. Why are you taking to your heart? Take it to your mind and process it and filter out what is invalid and consider what is valid. Valid, the heart will accept. Correct? No? Simple policy. God bless you. Take care. And if you have any other new topics, let us know. I will help you there. Right? It's my job to help you. And wish you all the best. I really, really wish you all the best to march ahead in your life and be good overcomers stay strong in your stand do not be shaken every problem as a solution that is the next topic I'm going to do a you know session on this topic every problem as a solution all right take care bye