Christian Motivation: Embracing Your Unique Strengths

You don't have to be the best always, but you can give your best.

Life is full of changes and unpredicted events.

It's okay to not be the best, but you can still strive for perfection.

Focus on your strengths and don't compare yourself to others.

Namaste, Namaskar, Vanakkam, my dear beloved friends. A warm welcome to one and all of you and I strongly believe that you are doing good. Even if it is otherwise, if you are not doing good per se, do not be worried. That is the reason why we are conducting these kind of sessions very, very regularly. Not just pep talks, not just a motivational talk, but we are talking through the facts of life. The reality is in life there are going to be various troubles through various forms, through various people, through various circumstance, through various situations, which is not in your control most of the times. Yeah, this guy behaved so very well yesterday and today he became my enemy. Yeah, you did not plan for it, you did not opt for it, but it just happened. You and I will have to manage things. You and I will have to handle such people or such circumstances and that does not mean that you and I will have to end in depression. Sorry, that's not the way to live your life. We have to live our lives happily, joyfully, regardless of any situations. Yes, there are certain moments. Very recently, just few days ago, one of my colleagues, he lost his 15-year-old son due to a prolonged illness. We cannot expect that person to overcome just like that. I knew another friend of mine, my college mate, she lost her husband and he was just 46 and they were left behind. He was left behind, survived by a 14 year old son and that is not possible for her to easily overcome. So, these are rare situations, rare occasions, not necessarily all of us go through this but there are people, you know, funny people, even if their tire is punctured, they will be so depressed. my tire never got punctured in 10 years you know for the first time it got punctured and all that yeah I was also one of those for all silly and crazy reasons I used to sit back and get worried but today not today it took me years almost a decade or more than that I have to keep on working on these shortcomings and that's why these kind of sessions are very important for you to understand what to overcome All right, a warm welcome to this motivational series, yet another day, yet another topic, yet another wonderful opportunity to learn something together, to discuss something together. The title of today's topic is a very interesting one. In fact, all of us must, it's like a must know, it's like, you know, must and should. you need not be the best always you are you don't have to be the best always but you have to give your best you understand why am i confusing many people many of us we always put in our best efforts nothing wrong and then the results they set up lot of expectations and the expectation is I have to always be first after always I don't even want the second best I want to be the best or I want to be the first especially starting with students that's why we entitled the discussion the sessions title is you don't have to be the best always but you can be at your best or you could be at your best sometimes due to certain situations for example that season there is some problem in your body in your your health is not at the best therefore you are not able to give the best of your efforts as you used to do once upon a time right there are situations where you are not always able to give your best that is also possible therefore don't take it for granted don't press yourself hard don't put yourself in that pressure shoes right you know some people they sit in the pressure cooker like the whistle comes whistle comes whistle blows when the pressure is on Some people always, they keep themselves under pressure. No, you don't have to. Because why? Situations and circumstances are never the same. It changes from day to day. So, even for you to give the best of your efforts, definitely there are various parameters and attributes that will have to be consistently in sync, which will never be the case. Your parameters will never be consistently in sync. Why? Because that's life. Life is full of changes. life is full of unprecedented and unpredicted events therefore it can never be always consistent but then provided say you are very lucky that always all attributes are consistent you're very healthy or very wealthy all is going well in your life then obviously you can give the best of your efforts always I want to clear that first now what is this title why can't I be the best always having the target having the mission or having that objective having that vision what is a vision or a mission or a target where you know under this title i want to be the best always nothing wrong nothing wrong we all have will we all will need to press out towards the perfection right and there is nothing wrong that i need to be the best like bill gates or or Rambanis or Adanis, Tatas, anybody, right? These are all top entrepreneurs. Or I want to be the best person who brings, you know change in the society like Mahatma Gandhiji the father of our Indian nation Nothing wrong But don be so depressed or don feel so deprived or dejected In case if you don't, become best. These are the best people, right? Best entrepreneurs, best sportsmen like Sachin Tendulkar. Now it's Virat Kohli and it was MS Dhoni some time ago. If you're not able to be top-notch batsmen like these guys, there is nothing wrong in you. There is nothing wrong in you at all. Why? Because you have given the best and probably you went very close to their records, which is fine. Right. Now, what I'm trying to say here is many people are surviving or operating their lives under this entitlement. I have to be the best always. Now, why there are pros and cons? We are going to discuss the pros and cons. And why not? Why always this I have to be at the best is not going to lead you towards positivity. There are a lot of negative factors attached to it. That is what we are going to review in the next 4-5 minutes and we will close. And we are going to categorize this discussion. We will start with students category, right. Most of us are parents and we all had been students once upon a time and the academic system has not gone any better. It has only gone worse. In the sense, there is a lot of pressure even today on kids, right. I am sure all the parents listening to me will understand. Academic system has really, really grown bigger and it is swollen bigger. That, you know, it's more pressure. The kind of weight they carry on their shoulders, the bag weight, you know, I am not able to carry because I have ergonomic issues due to my IT professional. Once I tried carrying my child's, you know, school bag and I could not. I ended up with severe pain. Yeah, I know one of my colleagues, he transports his daughter for this reason, that she is not able to carry the school bag. Although the school is just 5 minutes from his residence and no taxi fellow is coming for that 5 minutes, he ends up dropping and picking the kid because of this reason. So, the academic system is definitely putting a lot of pressure, not only the weight of the bag but the weight in the brains, both. Now, what all the parents are, I would say, 8 out of 10 parents impose on the kids, you have to really fight it hard. why 5th rank this time? Why 10th rank this time? Why only, you know, B grade this time? Or if there is a grade system, why not A, A plus, A plus plus grade or something like that? You know, there is nothing wrong, but you cannot impose that pressure on the kid, you know. The best phenomena is the kids can never have competitors. They, they, they compete, they have to compete with themselves this is exactly what every parent should you know encourage the child you know previous in your previous examination if you have scored 90 percentage dude buddy you really need to target for 91 percentage keep working on it but if the kid ends up with 89 percentage you don't have to really you know you know push them hard saying that last time 90% see you are playing so much you are doing this much you are you're watching television you are watching mobile yes of course keep them away from gadgets i don't disagree with you but i'm telling you you cannot keep you add more pressure you know this really builds pressure and all of us behind the brains i'm talking about the parents my kid will have to be the best my kid will have to be the best no just change the language my kid will have to be at his best that's it put the efforts that's karma right do your duty without expecting the results that's it encourage the child and you will see the results i see the results in my own child and i have heard this kind of testimony from many parents the day they stopped pressurizing the children they have started doing very well in their academics they have started doing very well in their lives i know many boy child boy children um they have really really gone astray in drug addictions alcoholic and this and that and you know once I happened to listen to one documentary in the rehabilitation center they have conducted a research and the research simply says that most of the kids say that my children my parents were pressurizing me to study my one of the guys was almost like a top ranker he comes second rank third rank in his in his in his school and then even in the college but that was not enough for the parents yeah they were pressurizing him Why can't you get 99 percentage? Why can't you get 98 percentage? The guy became a drug addict because of this reason. Yeah. So, you need not pressurize the kid, not necessarily at all that he should be the best, but always encourage the child they could be, they could, they could do their best. Right. They need not be the best, but they could do their best. They could put all their efforts to the, to the best of their kind, to best of their knowledge. That's enough. All right. Secondly coming to the working category only three categories because we don have time for everything Second category is working category This working category is even more complicated than the student category Why Because in the name of promotion these guys always fight with one another they bite each other they don share knowledge and they don share knowledge or they don cooperate they don work as a team What happens is on a longer run this the company will shut down because why every company needs teamwork every company needs that harmony you know we have to work as one team and most of the managers listening to me they themselves are the spoil ports spoil sports to build this kind of pressure in the minds of their employees why because unfortunately the appraisal system is all about comparison peer-to-peer comparison team to team comparison and stuff like that results to result comparison within the same organization right and that's the reason the managers always write feedback something like you are not up to the mark because your colleague they won't write that in the tool but they will convey the feedback because your colleague did much more than there is nothing wrong to compare but then you got to set the right targets to your employees you really have to set the platform sometimes what happens is there is a role conflict and this guy will be sitting and watching who is performing the best no there cannot be role conflict so define your roles in such a way that they don't end up conflicting with each other or competing with each other for the same role for the same kind of work the work should be uniquely defined yeah and the problem starts from there and it ends up with an employee and that's the reason the employee is underperforming why because he's always under pressure see when you are under pressure there are very few exceptions like ms dhoney who always wanted to you know hit 12 runs in two balls but not all you know finishers want to do that they really want to chase the target much before ahead therefore they need not hit two sixers in last two balls very few exceptions like ms dhoney but then most of us don't want to end up in such pressures correct or not you agree with me that's why it's very very important to lay down a structure now employees listening to me if you don't fall in that structure if your work is not organized if you're not enjoying your work you're consistently having that pressure there is an open-door policy in every company right but your manager will always say you should be the best you should be the best there can't there are ten people in the team not all ten can be the best if all ten are best they don't need a manager do you know that you should tell that to the manager hey you will lose your job man if we all ten are you know the best then we don't need you because we are a self-empowered team we are a self-organized team right that's that's actually a stupid principle you should not pay attention to that because in in the world all of us are not the same we are unique of our kind of our behavioral pattern of our IQ we are different from one another I am good at administrative stuff some stuff someone will may be good at technical stuff and the other one may be very good at you know the PPT PowerPoint presentations or the other one might be great in some other thing. I am talking about the IT world of things like that various fields are there chemical industry, mechanical industry, or in electrical industry. Everywhere the phenomena is the same, the competition phenomena is the same, right? And this is one category. The second category is always there is a pressure within ourselves in comparison to your colleague who joined at the same time that see we both joined at the same time today he's a director i am still sitting in the same level you see you see you don't have to feel so dejected and deprived absolutely not why because it's matter of time and opportunities probably the guy landed in a place where the growth pattern was really you know larger or greater or better than the tower where you have landed the business tower where you have landed and he got the opportunities at the right point of time and you don't have to feel so sorry about it. Why? Because not all of us can grow in the same pace. Not all of us can get promotions at the same time. If that were to be the case, the world will end right now. Right now. Because why? The world is operating in hierarchies. So, understand this, my dear friend, you know, whoever you are in whatever position you are, the world operates in hierarchy. There should be the topmost brass. There should be the, then one level down, you know, L1, L2, L3, L4 and L5, L6. and people this is like an umbrella of hierarchy only then an organization can function if all were to be promoted at the same time as to become L1 you know the world will not be able to function that's not the way how the world operates therefore chill out take it easy but there are peculiar cases where you have been cornered you have been targeted there is nothing going well between you and your manager ask for a project change if project change is also not working the company culture itself is some somewhere something is wrong the top level needs certain fixes but they are not imposing it therefore you need to find a different company you are not a bonded laborer that you your child your grandchild all will have to work for the same company have you written and signed in your blood somewhere no find a different company where you can get to grow that's why people switch companies why because the growth that they don't get in this company they get in the next company right because why they will find the right place where they will get their growth nothing wrong try your best in the same company but if you're not able to obtain what you what your colleague or what your friend has obtained when you both joined at the same time right I am taking the same example you are able to find it elsewhere therefore you can definitely be at your best but you can never be the best I am telling you the same I am from the beginning I am sticking to the same title right but there is a third category this working category my time is already up there there is a third category there are lot of people who are the best and this message is to them I telling you what you can be you might be the best or you might have been the best for a very very very long time From birth, I'm always first rank in school. Then I went to university, gold medalist. Then I went to some company A and company B and C. I'm top performer there. I got married, one husband and he always listens to me because I am the best, right? And I've got two children talking to some of the top performers, you know, some performers are really, you know, good, hardworking females or maybe hardworking male. There is no gender biases here. I'm just picking an example, right? My children also listen to me because I am the best. I am telling you, my dear beloved friend, with a lot of love and compassion I tell you this, you can never be at your best for lifetime. There are going to be situations where you will have to accept certain failures. You will have to accept certain downfall. You have to accept certain degradations. Or tactically or politically you might have got cornered. such people who don't have the mentality, who don't have the behavioral pattern to accept, to embrace failures tightly as much as they embrace success tightly. Not saying you should always embrace failure tightly. I am a failure. I am a failure. Not like that. But then once you embrace tightly the failure, the immediate next course of action would be, how can I overcome this failure? Because you had been a veteran, right? You have been always at success and you definitely know how to take the success path. But unfortunately, you never, you had not gone through failure for a very long time. You were at your best and you were the best. There are people belonging to this category. To such people, this message is, you are the most dangerous people to yourself. You are the most dangerous person to the society also sometimes. Why? Because you are not ready to accept that failure or someone else performed better than you. You inculcate this kind of revengeful attitude, avenging attitude, waiting for your chances to somehow pull down this guy. It's like a crab race. Crab will pull one another downwards and then nobody will climb up. Yeah. And what happens is because of this attitude, the company suffers. If there are 10 people like this in the company where there is a strength of 100 people, the total strength is 100 people. Imagine if there are 10 people with this attitude, nobody can climb more than me. Nobody can grow better than me. I want to be the best always. The company will shut down in months trying to tell you this. You should always have that attitude to accept the failure. Sometimes failure need not be necessarily a failure. the failure could be that someone else outperformed you someone else is better than you you really need to accept you need to respect that person's IQ right and learn learning is always nice you know not if not necessarily you should know everything in your life that's why I'm saying you can never be the best always there are always the life is full of learning right the life is a journey and the same time it's full of learning and always learn therefore you can keep on improving on the areas where you are not the best. I'll tell you what, if you have this attitude, if you are having this attitude of learning and accepting your shortcomings and accepting someone who has outbeaten you, I'll tell you in matter of time, you will be the best. One of the guys whom I admire the most is Mr. Radhan Tata. The guy never got married because he said, I'm married to the business. The day I took over, I'm married to this business, my heart, soul life everything i dedicated today also you can see all the tata products right from the automobiles the salt everything there is a speciality the tata products are really made for you know with quality and all that i'm not saying other products are bad but tata has that speciality right from 17th century the people are in this business and tata is the only company which has established this business across the globe more than any entrepreneur you can google if you don't believe me you will be surprised right and they are the wealthiest company that i've ever known in india right right now ambanis and adhanis are trying to overtake but tata holds his speciality why because it's in their bloodline right to be the best right but the same ratan tata also had written down lots of philosophical messages he has given that he has also gone through lots of downs yeah at some point of time whatever they tried to release in the market did not do well but they kept on working on that and today they are the number one automobile sellers some point of time everyone used to market tata cars but tata is the top selling car now right not without a failure he became the best i can go on and on beloved with so many examples but i think this is enough do your best but never ever get dejected if you are not the best all right god bless you take care and please subscribe to our channel there are lots and lots of motivational videos which you may not have seen go to our playlist please this is all going to only help you therefore do watch and feel encouraged be cheerful and encourage others to and share these channel details right let let others also go through these videos and it will only help you right thank you very much stay tuned stay connected I'll meet you soon namaste

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